She Cums Up With A Plan And Hastily Loses Her...

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Kristin’s eyes were tightly closed as she rolled on her side. Seemingly unable to speak, she patted the bed behind her. I moved up to spoon her and she grabbed my arm to pull me tightly against her.I’m glad she was facing away from me so she didn’t have to see the confused expression on my face. “That was wonderful,” she finally sighed, and I mentally jumped up and clicked my heels.“I can’t move,” she groaned. “Would you blow out the candles?” I did and we spent the first night of many together.The next two years were the happiest of my life. We got tested and she got birth control so we could get rid of the latex. The weekend we got the all-clear, we hardly stopped to eat—food, that is.I don’t think I ever really figured out when things started to go bad between us. Up to the end, I thought we were OK or at least fixable. But one day she said she was moving out.The next year was the worst of my life. Kristin didn’t hook up with anyone for a long time and I kept thinking she would. Now that the milk is free, we've both become lactose intolerant". --Margaret Cho"My wife is a sex object - every time I ask for sex, she objects".--Les Dawson"Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship".--Sharon Stone"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time".--Robin Williams"I want to tell you a terrific story about oral contraception. I asked this girl to sleep with me and she said 'No'".--Woody Allen"Erotica is using a feather; pornography is using the whole chicken".--Isabel Allende"You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman. Stuff you pay good money for later in life".--Emo Philips"If you wear a short enough skirt, the party will come to you".--Dorothy Parker"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps".--Tiger.
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"Whoa!" The sound came from the old newspaper vendor as she paused for an instant."Wouldja look at that!" He said looking down into his wooden tray that held the coins."Both of your quarters are stand-in' up on their narrow ends, like wheels on a train! I don't think that ever happen'd here b'fore. Gonna be a big day for you babe!" The old geezer said to the young woman."Gee I hope so, I could use a break from this heat already," Darla said, mistaking what he'd said about the coins for a remark about the weather. She headed off to find a cab, obviously not impressed by the numismatic importance of the coins' position in his dirty tray.A man exited a cab a few feet away from the door and Darla ran for it, and stepped right in front of another middle aged woman holding a large black bag. The woman was surprised but only sneered and just stood there as Darla opened the door."Hey, are you heading downtown?" Darla asked the woman, shocking her further, looking directly into her well made.

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